Heart

Two nights ago, trying to fall asleep, I had my hand under my chest and suddenly noticed the beating of my heart. It was alarmingly small and slow. Like a freezing bird leaning against the bars of my ribcage. When I exhaled it felt even closer, less than half an inch from my fingers. When I inhaled, it receded deeper within my chest, behind a shield of muscle and fat. I exhaled and stopped breathing to keep it close and there it was again, thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Made me think more about the miracle of life. Made me think more about taking a good multi-vitamin. Fortunately, I fell asleep pretty quickly.

Then my dad, somehow forgetting about the time difference, called at 3am to argue with me about the ports issue. I pled slumber and he apologized and that was that. Just me and my adenalin-shocked heart alone again in the dark, exiled from the last dream and waiting for the next one to come along.